That Thing Called Tadhana

Sometimes, I can't help but to question myself why. Why I acted the way I act that day. Why I did this or did that. At the end of the day, I always feel regrets…

I wish I wouldn't feel regrets. I hate feeling regret. Regrets…

I know that we should move on and focus on more important things in our life. Hindi naman purket mahal mo siya, mahal ka niya, magfo-focus na kayo sa isa't-isa. At hindi porket sinabi niyang mahal ka niya ay maniniwala ka na lang basta. Ang pag-ibig, hindi lamang puro salita ang lahat. Ipinapakita rin sa gawa.

Madalas akong madismaya-- sa sarili ko at sa kaniya. Marahil ay dahil ito ang unang pagkakataon kong umibig, at mahalin din. Pakiramdam ko, mas mahal ko siya kaysa sa pagmamahal niya sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ganoon.

Ang sabi nila, dapat daw, mas mahal ka ng tao para sa huli, hindi ikaw ang talo.

The truth is, I am so afraid of what I am feeling right now. It was so overwhelming It was like standing in a hanging platform with a black hole underneath it.  I feel like, whether I like it or not, I will fall and get hurt. And I will always get hurt in the end. There were always an end. And there's got to be someone na masasaktan. O maaring pareho, pero may isang tao pa rin ang mas labis na masasaktan.

At natatakot akong baka ako 'yon.

I don't know if he's just not expressive but sometimes I feel like I'm nothing to him.

I feel like, I'm just a past time.

I feel like, if ever there is anyone who will come in the way, he will leave me and broke my heart.

Its complicated to fall in love.

I already gave my heart to him and there's no way of getting it back.

I want to open up my insecurities and issues to him. But I'm afraid… nakakatakot na baka lalo siyang lumayo sa akin kapag nalaman niya iyon…

First time to fall in love and to be loved.  Sana, hindi ako ma-reject agad… >.<

Tang i*a na pelikula. Humuhugot tuloy ako. HUHUHU…