DRAMA Blues

There are many things i want to say on this blog right now but i don't know where to start. LOL Anyway, it just feels kinda weird that.. like... I'm attached to someone. I look forward to this person's next message to me. LOL It's not that I feel something to him, but I really want to know that person more, as a friend. Sa kaniya kasi, nakukuwento ko ang mga nangyayari sa buhay ko. It just feels light when i talk to him :)

Siguro, ganito lang ang pakiramdam ng gusto mong may makausap ka kahit sandali lang. `Yong makukuwento mo sa taong `yon `yong nakakahiyang nangyari sa buhay mo nang ayos lang sa kaniya at hindi ka huhusgahan. `Yong may pakialam... Minsan kasi, i feel like i have no friends. Minsan lang naman. LOL

Ah, Thanks to him, i was able to blurt out my frustrations in life. He's really a friend...

Friend. What is the definition of a friend? During my 2nd year in highschool, a book once defined it as "Friend is a precious jewel" (Okay, hindi `yon definition kundi comparison). So ayun, indeed it is... a precious jewel. I always want to have precious jewels (friends), pero hindi ko pa nahahanap `yong ultimate bestfriend ko. Siguro dahil na rin sa personality ko na.. introvert. Yes, I believe I am sometimes an introvert. `Yong tipong mas gustong mapag-isa. Ang weird `no? `Yong tipong takot sabihin ang nararamdaman sa isang tao... kung natutuwa ba ako, naiinis, nagagalit. It's true that i don't live in other's opinion but i care about their feelings. 

*Sigh* I missed my few friends way back in college. Kapag naaalala ko `yong mga kalokohan namin no'n at kung gaano kami ka-close kumpara ngayon na may sari-sarili ng buhay, nakaka-miss lang talaga. Bakit kasi kapag nagkakaroon ng bagong buhay ang iba, hindi na nagre-reach out sa mga taong naging parte ng nakaraan nila. Minsan tinatanong ko, am i really their friend? or kaibigan pa rin ba ang turing nila sa 'kin? Sometimes, i feel like i deserved no one as a friend... kasi ayaw na nilang makihalubilo sa 'kin dahil busy na sila sa buhay nila. (drama mode)

Noon pa, hinahanda ko na ang sarili ko na mamuhay mag-isa-- ng hindi umaasa kanino man. Ang babaw ko talaga. Daig ko pa ang may problema sa lovelife. LOL

Its not really a problem, its just how i feel this week..o sa mga nakalipas na araw. Ah, poor me.

Next time, ang masaklap na lovelife ko naman ang ikukuwento ko. `Di ba, ang enjoy maging ako? But really, kahit ganito ako, i feel like I'm more fortunate than others pa rin naman. :) At least I have relatives that cares for me...

There are just some people whom i care about that they doesn't seem to care to me that much. *DRAMA*

Signing off.